Progress

Tonight I just kind of broke down. I was upset and crying and I didn't really know what to do. I decided to text my friend Brian. Holy Goodness my Father has blessed me with some really understanding, non-judging, totally reliable, super wise friends. I was to the point where I just didn't want to disobey God. I didn't want to struggle, especially not with dumb stuff like the fact that I'm single. I am so totally in love with my Lord that I don't want anything else! His lovingkindness is way better than life and that's all I want and all I need. With this being said, I still have struggles. Tonight it was simply that I was bummed that guys seemed to be hopelessly non-Christ like and I was getting discouraged. Luckily, I could call on Brian to be a great friend and just let me cry and talk and let God completely speak through him. Brian brought to my attention that David, a man "after God's own heart", even struggled. He saw Bathsheba and lost it. Not to mention Peter. Peter had to deny Christ THREE times for him to know that he never wanted to do it again and it lead Peter to the point where he died in defense of Christ. How beautiful and powerful are the stories in the Bible! Today at our FOCUS meeting I started thinking about how we not only have our own life experiences to share with people how amazing and merciful God is, but we have a WHOLE book full of tons of stories of people who struggle in different ways and in the end progress in their love of God. "I think that God isn't as concerned about perfection as we think He is. I think that He is more concerned with progress. If we learn and grow, He is happy." - Brian. How true is that! It comforts me to know that I don't disappoint God. He loves me and He is just happy that I'm growing and progressing and learning more and more how to love Him day by day, second by second. Thank you, my Lord. You are my rock and You are my Father. I am so thankful to be your baby girl. Father, your love is so much better than life! I can't even describe in words how much  in awe I am constantly of your power and grace and love. I am thankful that you are the creator of love. I am so thankful that you fill my life with uplifting friends. I  will sing of Your love forever and ever! I will praise You with all that I do, in every season of life. I will praise You through every struggle, through every trial. YOU are my Lord. I am in awe that You allow us to call you "my husband" instead of "my master." You are more intimate than a master, more personal and loving. You constantly amazing me and rock my world. I am thankful for your mysterious ways because that is where all of the beauty comes from. I can't believe that You pick me up when I fall and you save me from evil desires. Father, you see my heart and you know my deepest, truest desires. I desire you. I love you. I'm always so thankful for everything you are and everything you've done in my life and others' lives.