Learning every day

Today was another day at the Boys & Girls Club. Normally I go on Fridays, but I won't be able to this Friday which is why I went today. They had to finish up some projects so we didn't even get started until 6 (I got there at 4:30). While they were working on their projects they were talking and I noticed that they never really talked about anything except other people.  A lot of things they said were very offensive (mostly talking about the way people look and making fun of them). Finally I said "let's try to talk about things other than other people." I wasn't really expecting them to listen to me let alone do what I said but they actually tried to be better about it.

On the drive home I caught myself thinking that was just how middle schoolers are; "kids will be kids," right? Then on second thought, I realized that I talk about people too and I know a lot of people (college-aged and older) who can't figure out what to talk about if they aren't talking about other people's business or the way they look or how they dress. Shame on us. Why don't we talk about things that actually make us and those around us happy? Why are we so concerned with criticizing others for their short comings? How self-righteous of us. It doesn't make me happy; it might make me feel a little better about myself to talk about how someone else is rude or isn't living their life according to my definition of "right," but it never makes me happy and I know it doesn't encourage anyone I'm talking to or about. If we spent as much time encouraging others as we do criticizing them, life would be a little easier. Sometimes my heart just breaks for humanity. Life is hard enough as it is without everyone being so discouraging; why add to it?

Moving on, I also realized that when you're teaching, you need to establish yourselves at the very start. Yes, I want to be approachable and I want to be their friend, but they will not listen to me if I let them talk over me all the time. Today I was a lot more assertive and it worked a lot better. At the beginning I had three girls and three boys. One girl had to leave after she was done with her project and one girl said she was going to the bathroom and never came back. Not gonna lie, it hurt a little that she felt the need to lie and couldn't just say that she didn't want to do photo class anymore. I don't expect all of them to be super stoked about photography like I am. No one is making them be in there. I'll have to talk to her next week about it but in a way it opened the door to tell the rest of the students that it won't hurt my feelings if they don't want to be in class but I don't want to waste their time and I don't want them to waste mine.

Today I told them about how the camera works and different types of light. After that, I asked them if they'd rather make a video. They were extremely excited for that. They decided that they wanted to make a horror film (there's a huge graveyard right behind the building). I was getting pumped that they were pumped. But, I had to be sure they weren't in over their heads. One guy said, "It doesn't need to be long; it could be like an hour long." I had to break him to the reality of how hard that is and that we only have a month so we need to shoot for like a 10-15 minute film short. I'm letting them write the script and shoot it then I'll edit it for them.

Overall, today had its pros and cons. A lot of it made me think pretty seriously about life and society. I'm still in the process of earning their respect although I'm not entirely sure how to go about doing that. Maybe it'll come with time. I really hope this movie idea ends up working because I think it will be something they can be proud of that is creative and healthier than the other things they are proud of (like fighting, having a hot girlfriend/boyfriend, and/or being popular).